Title: Five Things Rodney Forgot -
posted April 21, 2009
Author: Lacey McBain
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Rating: PG. Could be
McKay/Sheppard pre-slash in parts.
Summary: The title says it all.
Spoilers: Spoilers through
Notes: For aurora_84
Five Things Rodney Forgot
1. Jennifer Keller
didn’t mean to, but there was a freaky space parasite in his brain and
everything he knew, everything, was leaking out faster than he could
plug the holes. Sure, he liked her, she was cute and she paid attention
to his medical concerns, but when all was said and done, she was
another Polaroid face with a name underneath, someone John coached him
on when there were only shadows and quickly unraveling threads of
When John was the only thing that remained.
2. Madison’s birthday
“She’s your only niece,” Jeannie yelled at him after a tense dinner
with party hats and lemon cake.
“You tried to poison me with cake!”
can’t think of anyone who deserves it more!” Jeannie shouted back. “You
forgot my daughter’s birthday, in spite of it being in your PDA, your
laptop, and your cell phone. For God’s sake, Mer, I put a sticky note
on your computer screen!”
“So that’s what that was about.”
Jeannie threw up her hands. “John phoned and wished her a happy
“Of course he did. He’s just trying to show me up, you know.”
“Fine, fine. Tomorrow I’ll take her to the science museum and she can
ride on the flight simulator as much as she wants.”
“And you'll apologize, and you’ll buy her a present.”
“Anything she wants. Even if it’s pink and doesn’t have a battery.”
Rodney stuttered, but took one look at Jeannie’s face and decided
acquiescence was his best option.
be the best day-after-her-birthday she’s ever had,” Rodney promised,
already preparing for how to convince Madison that a Wii was a much
better option than a Barbie playhouse.
3. His name
wishes he could forget that he’s a Meredith in a long, long line of
Merediths. As if “Rodney” wasn’t enough of a handle for a pudgy
too-smart kid to be saddled with, his parents and Jeannie had to insist
on calling him by his given name—loudly and indiscriminately. As soon
as he hit university and could actually do something about it, he faked
his birth certificate and banished Meredith from his life forever.
Meredith is dead. Long live Rodney.
4. How to defuse a nuclear bomb
“It’s the red wire,” John said, leaning over Rodney’s shoulder. “It’s
always the red wire.”
“Yes, I’m sure that’s what the Popular Mechanics Guide to Bomb
Defusing says, but it’s not that simple!”
“We’ve got less than two minutes.”
“I know how to tell time, Sheppard.”
“Then make the clock stop counting down, Rodney.”
okay, shut up and let me think.” Rodney could feel the sweat pooling at
the nape of his neck. It had really been too long since he’d done this.
“The yellow wire’s a decoy, the blue wire’s to the timer, but it
doesn’t actually connect to the detonator, the black wire’s another
decoy, the green—”
“Rodney, just pick a wire and pull it, or it’s not going to matter
He closed his fist around the red wire, felt Sheppard’s hand settle on
his shoulder, and pulled.
5. The way to San Jose
thought you said you’d been here before.” John glared at Rodney, his
lap full of GPS, map, travel guide, bottled water, a Power Bar wrapper,
and no less than two cell phones.
“No, I said I’d been to the
conference before. It changes location each year.” Rodney scrunched up
the map and threw it out the window of their rental car.
I have no idea why I counted on you to find me in Pegasus. You’re crap
with directions.” Sheppard shook his head and took the bottle of water
from Rodney’s lap. The air conditioning had stopped half an hour out of
L.A., and John wondered again why he’d let Rodney talk him into going
with him to a conference of astrophysicists.
“Look, there’s a
gas station. Pull in and ask for directions,” Rodney said, slapping
John on the arm and pointing. The car rumbled to a stop in a cloud of
dust, and John glared at Rodney through his aviator sunglasses and
refused to get out of the car.
“Fine,” Rodney fumed. “I’ll do
it.” He marched over to the gas jockey, and with as much dignity as he
could muster with Sheppard laughing in the background, asked: “Excuse
me. Do you know the way to San Jose?”
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